Starstruck

Glossary Entry: Troikani

 

Troikani Actors

Troikani Actors

The people of Troika (both singular and plural). The answer to the well-worn joke, “How many Troikani does it take to screw in a lightbulb?” has at least a dozen recognizable answers, all of them containing the number three or multiple of three, the favorite being, “Three. One to screw in the light bulb, one to offer a critique, and one to call the union and complain about being forced to engage in labor meant to be done by a lighting technician.”  A Troikani has an extremely flexible persona, a very shallow id, and almost no sense of self. It takes the hearts, minds and souls of at least three Troikani to make even one respectable psyche. Even so, they can quickly adapt to the most extreme environment, melt quietly into the strangest of cultures and mimic ANYTHING, creature or concept, in the known universe. They make excellent actors. When left alone, without the company of others of its species, a Troikani will have one of three reactions: 1) It will pine away and die, 2) It will run through its entire repertoire of roles (these collected over a lifetime) at a speed incredible to behold until dead from exhaustion, 3) It will call the actors’ union every marbec on the marbec to complain about everything in the known universe until the union sends someone to put it out of its misery.