Starstruck

Glossary Entry: Those Crazy Stars

A song that received a lot of play (some would say too much play) during the early cycles of Anarchera, written by Celedon Rabe and sung by a customized model of the multi-myd, adjustable personality, male pleasure droid, Joe Andy Nova. Joe Andy (one of them, anyway) made a goldmine touring the settled Multiverse, after his (their?) song became a hit, though it has been speculated that any singer one might have seen, during any one of those shows, may have been any one of a very large line of Joe Andys. In the song’s lyrics, Rabe is lamenting the fact that he has been jilted by his android love and that, in all probability, she had never reciprocated his feeling in the first place. (One might posit that the composer had unrealistic expectations, as regards the outcome of such a union.) It is somewhat ironic that the song’s most famous singer was himself (or itself) a droid.  As with any wildly popular song, there have been many covers recorded, some of them substituting the word “girl” for “droid,” as well as other nouns (or noun-like words) that describe potential mating partners in various alien tongues.

Just cherish what we had and then,
Don’t dwell on what we coulda been.
An’ if you’re left with scars,
Just blame it on those crazy stars!

There’s a big, black hole where your heart oughta be,
Your own very singular singularity.
It’s that age old problem, call it gravity!
You sucked me in, little droid,
So don’t pretend, little droid,
‘Cause those crazy stars, don’t give a boot for me!

There’s that crazy laser show, where your eyes oughta be!
Hey, they knocked me on my ass – I mean that literally!
You know, I feel like I’m in Freefall,
Tell me why don’t I feel free!
My circuits all have been blown!
Say, Hey, have you got a clone?
Who’ll make those crazy stars shine just for me!

From the moment that we met, I was light as a nutrino!
I never woulda bet, that you could be so mean-oh-wo-wo-wo!

There’s a crazy dimmer switch, where my love used to twitch!
We went from hyper-WOW to sub-so-long and all without a hitch!
Take a long walk off a transport tube, you trans-galactic Bi-
(last word drowned out by horns)

When space has lost all its charms,
You’ll blast back into my arms!
Till then those crazy stars won’t shine….
No they won’t.
Cause I aint getting mine…
So they don’t.
Because those crazy stars don’t give a boot for me!